Ruan's Journal

Ruan’s Journal

Ruan has kept a journal since he started paramedic school on Ariel 2 years ago. It is a mix of chronological dated entries with single page lists interspersed within the pages. Each one of the lists has a single large heading and numbered items below. These items all appear to be added at different times, as though Ruan was writing them in as he thought of them rather than all at one time. Occasionally the lists have cross references to each other (as though he realized the 2 separate items were related after the fact).

A few of the lists are:

Places I Have Travelled To:
This is the most extensive list, containing all the planets and places the Britannia has been, but also places where it hasn’t such as Sihnon, Osirus, Londinium, and Santo.

Work I Have Completed:
This is a list of descriptions, some quite vague such as “picked up the paperwork” while others are quite detailed “eliminated 4 targets in order to secure lockbox access”.

Targets People I Have Killed:
Another descriptive list in which Ruan appears to have recently crossed out the cold and clinical “Targets” as an acceptance of what really happened. There are no names on the list, only physical identifiers such as “female, tall, long hair, companion” or “group of six, body armor, with weapons”. There are 38 items on the list including some that were added recently (“2 ship jackers, armed” and “3 guards, kept slaves”).

The Four Six Real Memories:
(These are the only real memories that Ruan has from before going to the Academy. They appear to have been added to over time as though the detail is becoming clearer.)

  1. I lived in a housing block in Londinium. It was outside the government circle. There was a cement walk way and multiple levels. I lived in a midlevel unit. All of the doors were different colors. Our door was red.
  2. The reclamation unit in our kitchen would break and instead of incinerating trash before sending it to the composter would sometimes spit trash back out. Whenever this happened, my father would curse in Mandarin and fix it with very old tools from a wooden box.
  3. There is snow swirling around the Londinium parliament building.
  4. There is a glass case and there are trophies and plaques in it. I think this is my school. Or a training facility. They are awards for gymnastics competitions. There are names on all the plaques and trophies. One of the names is my name, but I can’t read it. I can see my reflection in the metal. I’m young.
  5. I am on a beach. There are waves coming in and out. A girl runs past me and tags me on the shoulder. I am “it” now so I chase her. She is my sister.
  6. There is a black transport. I am walking towards it from my school. There are 2 men walking with me. I don’t like them but I don’t know why. Inside the transport is another man and I go to him only to get away from the 2 other men. They have blue gloves on.

At the top of one page it simply says:

5 _ 9 _ _ _ 2 9

The numbers all appear to be added at different times, as though Ruan is trying to remember an 8 digit number of which in the beginning he could only remember the last 2 digits.

Then immediately below it is "59955429/Locke" written hastily in different ink as though it was suddenly remembered all at once.

Around Unification Day 2516 Ruan's journal entries change and he starts writing about the lives and thoughts of other people almost as much as he writes about his own.

There is a very large section dedicated to Adelai Niska. It is mostly very detailed descriptions of torture of various prisoners and how much Niska enjoyed it. Mostly Niska wears his reputation on his sleeve for all to see, but there are a few secrets that Niska would probably rather remain hidden (secret alliances, informant names, locations of safe havens). Ruan's own commentary on this is very short: "Get square and don't work for him or Magda again."

There are a few pages that are clipped together so the contents are hidden and the top page is blank with the exception of the word "PRIVATE". These pages contain Ruan's impression of what he gleaned when he accidentally read Tia's mind. It's quite steamy and it's clear that Ruan wanted to keep the details fresh.

Ruan has also recently been writing much more about his past, but these memories are written in a strange 3rd person style as though from another person's perspective. Occasionally he will chime in with an additional observation that appears to be his own.

Given the sensitivity of the information inside, Ruan keeps the journal well hidden when he's not actually writing in it.