Ifoss Intrigues

Summary
The party finally arrives in Ifoss. They begin questioning locals for information about the vampires, but there are no churches of Tyr or the High Lord. Ragnar goes to speak with the church of Torm. They are unaware of any vampire issues, but promise to send word as they hate the chaos vampires would cause. Roskva goes to a square by the church of Simyits to do her fortune telling schtick with Rorgan on watch. She is approached by two town guards who ask for her permit and tell her to cease and desist. She gets snappy with them and tries to cast Charm Person on a guard. The guard grapples with her to stop her spell and the other smashes her in the head with his night stick and knocks her out (GM's note- I beat Chmiel on initiative, the first guard roll an 18 to grapple and the second got a natural 20 to knock her out). She wakes up back in her room at the inn a few hours later. Rorgan says he managed to get the guards to drop charges, but they confiscated her stuff. She spends the evening in the inn, buying drinks for the locals. Wittr goes to a whorehouse to see if any vampires might be preying on prostitutes and their clients. Roskva goes along and hires company for the night. Wittr bribes the staff to let him talk to the madame, an old and unattractive human woman. She has no information either and when Wittr gets pushy, she grabs him in a ball crusher and tells him to get out (GM's note: Natural 20 again!).
The next day they go talk to the priests at Torre's church who are much friendlier and helpful. They will ask the locals, including the Thieves' Guild. The head priest, Mender Ardrel asks them to come back to tomorrow. Wittr tries Speak with Animals on local alley cats, but they know nothing of vampires. When they return to Torre's church, Ardrel has a lot of information for them. The Blood Dawn is a ritual requiring a massive sacrifice at a magical location with a dark artifact to help power it. Centuries ago, before Ifoss was here, there were old ruins that connected to the Underdark. A band of adventures who possessed an item of great power were lost in the caverns. It is possible the catacombs beneath the city still connect to the lost caverns and the vampires are seeking to retrieve the lost item. His contacts are looking to see if it is true, the party should stock up for a long mission underground. He offers a Potion of Protection from Evil for each party member to help them. The party heads out to buy supplies and Clare finds an enchanted lamp to help light their way.
When they return the next day, they leave their horses in the temple's stable and Ardrel says the Thieves' Guild gave him some information; they are not happy about vampires wandering around in their tunnels. Ardrel leads them to an abandoned building and leads them through a door which appeared to be boarded up. A spiral staircase descends into the city's catacombs. He gives Roskva a set of directions and wishes them luck and Torre's blessings. The party follows the directions along a branch of the sewers, walking on the ledges along the channel. They come to a side passage with a recently broken down door. Roskva peeks and a group of wights charge out. Ragnar tries to turn them and fails. The party goes hand to hand with the wights, Duma jumps the sewer stream to the other side to move up and attack. Ragnar tries to jump it as well, but slips and lands in the water… Roskva blinds most of the wights and breaks past them,but one claws her and she is paralyzed. Rorgan slips past the undead to help Roskva, but he is paralyzed as well. Wittr summons a Moonblade and joins Clare and Duma in slaying the last of the wights. The wounded are healed and Roskva and Rorgan finally come out of their paralysis.
They continue deeper into the catacombs, travelling across town towards an area of natural caves that may connect to the Underdark. Along the way, a horrible apparition comes out of the darkness; a creature like a giant floating brain with a vicious beaked mouth and many tentacles hanging below. It flies to the party and attacks Roskva and Rorgan and lifts Roskva in its tentacles. Her Armor spell barely protects her from its stinging tentacles and the aberration is slain. But for such a creature to appear beneath the city, there must be a connection to the caverns.
Their directions finally bring them the caves, which descend lower from the city catacombs. The passage is twisty and wet and they come to a cave area with a deep pool along one side. As they cross the cave, tentacles emerge from the water and begin flailing at them. A small eyestalk watches them from the water, it must be an Otyugh. The tentacles strike and wound the party, but they attack the tentacles and sever them and the wounded beast retreats into the depths of the pool. They skirt the pool carefully and descend into the caverns below the city.
The passage they take is mostly water carved, the cave floor has stream deposited gravel and sand. Rorgan spots recent tracks in the deposits and they follow. The passage widens into a cave with four exits. Rorgan examines all the tracks and decides there are at least a half dozen individuals, they explored the openings together, then all left through one passage. The party follows the tracks. The passage winds and twists, sometimes widening and other times constricting, but never so much to be impassable. Fungus growths spot the walls, some are even luminescent. They come to another widening which swells to a large cavern, dozens of feet across. Several streams run through it and there are many large mushrooms and such growing here. But there is also movement and four giant beetles emerge to attack the party. Spells, arrows and blades cut the giant bugs apart. They move deeper into the caves, which run a considerable distance and steadily descend. A clicking noise comes from the darkness and two giant centipedes rush the party. Clare and Rorgan kill one while the rest of the party slays the other. They find an area of dry in the passage with very few signs of moss or fungus. Since they have been in the caves all day, they make camp, set watches and rest for the night. In the "morning" they continue onward and downward. Ragnar estimates they are more than 200 feet underground. They fins an area where a chasms crosses the passage, but a rope bridge spans the gap. The bridge is newly made of human style ropes. The passage descends more sharply and the air grows stale. At a fork in the passage, they are attacked! A pair of vampire spawn rush the party, then two human fighters open fire with bows. Clare duels and kills one of the spawn single handed, Rorgan, Ragnar and Duma kill the other. Roskva tries to blind the warriors with Dazzle but gets Duma and Rorgan instead. Clare and Roskva kill one of the fighters and the other surrenders after Duma strikes him twice. Rorgan realizes the spawn are regenerating and stakes one through the heart with a broken arrow. Ragnar stakes the other with a climbing spike and Roskva sets one on fire with a Combust spell and they toss the other spawn on the fire.
Questioning the warrior they find out that the vampires have gone deeper into the caverns where the air is unbreathable. They could follow with a Slow Poison spell, but it would only last four hours. They decide to ambush the vampires. Roskva turns most of the party invisible and Rorgan hides under his Cloak of Elvenkind. When the vampires return, the female is carrying what looks like a hand axe with a long, scythe-like blade. The party attacks them, Clare and Duma have strength raising spells from Ragnar. Roskva tries to stay back and cast spells, but a hooded figure comes out of the shadows behind her and stabs her with poisoned daggers and she collapses. Rorgan hits the female vampire with arrows several times and she hits hit with Magic Missile. When he tries to hide under his cloak, she fills the passage with a Cone of Cold. Wittr finishes the male vampire with a direct hit from a Moon Blade spell (Natural 20!). Duma attacks the assassin but falls victim to his poison as well and collapses across Roskva. While the rest of the party fights the vampiress, Clare strikes down the assassin. Ragnar gets Duma and Roskva back awake. Duma rejoins the fight and is wounded by the black axe, the wounds bleed heavily. The party captures the vampiress and questions her. Wittr drops a few of their clues from the vampire's letter which surprise her.
Ragnar heals the party, but his first healing prayer only stops Duma's bleeding from the axe wound, it takes another to heal her. They decide to finish off the vampires and return to the surface with the axe and other loot.

Silly Quotes and Smart Remarks
Chmiel "We should get lunch in Elftown"

Chmiel's mage is playing fast and loose with Charm Person spell and leaning towards evil
Jim "I'm going upstairs to get the first campaign folder and have Joram the cleric spank your mage"

Going out at night to visit the whorehouses for information
Matt "I wear my purple cloak"
Jim "Is that your pimpin' cloak?"

Chmiel's mage hires a prostitute for the evening and heads back to the party's inn the next morning
Mike "You better clean yourself first; all the alley cats are following you like a can of tuna"

Discussing a Ring of Protection
MC "That's a chastity belt"

Looking for an inn
Chmiel "Gspot would be a great name for a cafe"
Ryan "But no one would be able to find it"
MC "No man would be able to find it"

Chmiel "We go looking for the Artists' Quarter- Hipster Town"

Undead attack the party
MC "There's no hobbits here, we don't have a ring"

Discussing various ways to check for traps
Matt "Cure Moderate Wounds works as a trap finder in hindsight"

Discussing weight versus bulk of characters crossing a rope bridge
Matt "I'm very dense" <general snickering>

MC rolls poorly
MC "Fuck balls!"

Kimi's barbarian is interrogating the prisoner
Kimi "I want to bite his ear off"
Matt and Jim "Okay Mike Tyson"
Kimi "Who?"

Discussing vampires' weaknesses
MC "Steaks, particularly porterhouse"

A masked and hooded dark figure backstabs Roskva
Jim "He looks thiefy"
MC "Covfefe?"